The first day at day care is a big one for all concerned mum, child and carer. It is exciting and terrifying at the same time. Here are a few tips on how best to prepare all of you for the big day and help make that transition a smooth one.

Mom - Start gently preparing your child in advance, mentioning what a great adventure day care will be with lots of friends and games. Keep it low key though do not overdo it as this could overwhelm your child. Provider - You could provide mom with the first names of children and carers at the day care and suggest role playing with dolls so everything is not completely strange on that first day.

Mom should try to foster independence in the weeks preceding with visits to friends and providing activities the child will encounter at the day care and providers should be sure to encourage mom and child to visit the day care a couple of times before starting in order to allow the child to absorb the environment.

Mom should be sure to have everything packed for the day e.g. snacks, change of clothes, comfort toys and ensure everything is labeled. Be sure and have monies paid and forms completed before the big day so you are not distracted by these tasks. Have lots of time to get ready the morning of the big day with a good breakfast and some talk about the great adventure ahead. Carers should have an extra person on hand when a new child is starting so that one person can focus on distracting and comforting the new child. It is also advisable to have the child start at a time when everyone is settled into their morning activities. I wouldn't recommend first thing in the morning when the flurry of activity could be upsetting for the new child.

Providers, insist that parents walk their child from the car to the door. Mom, allow your child to pack his own bag. When you get to the day care do not carry him, this will just make the separation all the harder. Hold his hand and walk him to the door.

Providers, your settling in routines are vital and it is crucial you allow mom to be there but not be there. Let the child move at his own pace - be it observing quietly or playing alone. Provide one on one support and be ready when mom leaves to whoosh him away and providing lots of distraction with toys and activities.

Mom,the first day of settling in you will probably stay in the room, allowing your child to do his own thing but remaining in sight. Gauge his reactions by stepping out of the room momentarily, explain that you are making a phone call and are just in the hall. Allow the staff to distract your child and observe from a distance (obviously, do not let him see you). When the time comes for you to sit in the car or go for a coffee say, bye mom will see you later, positively and with a quick kiss then leave the room. If your child cries do not look back, once you are out of sight the child will stop crying shortly and will be distracted by play and activities.

It is very important to establish this drop off routine from day one. Firm and consistent is key with children. Communication and understanding between parents and providers will make for a smooth and enjoyable transition for the child. Now, moms, enjoy your cup of coffee in peace!!! Providers enjoy your new little personality!

10 years experience of running a day care renders Fiona Lohrenz very capable of writing articles on all aspects of childcare. She also pours this knowledge into her child care website and has made a 'How to Start a Child Care Business' DVD guide: StartChildCare.com She can be reached at her website: ChildCareOnly.com